Daily life
So This Is Me... - Days 7 & 8: Dictionary Definition Loser
So This Is Me...
Day 2: A Word On Words
Days 3-6: Undercover
Days 7 & 8: Dictionary Definition Loser
Day 9: The Visible Mantle
Days 10 and 11: Theoretically
Days 12-22: Geekitis
FOR EDON AND ANDREW
Days 23-25: echo
Days 25-31(?): One Leap Ahead, So Close...
Days 32-36: Lonliness is Living Death
Since You've Been Gone
Freedom
Stereotypes and Stereo News
One Thing


So yesterday I went swimming with my BFF and BGF (reminder: Best Guy Friend)and my brother and his annoying friend. Turns out that it wasn't such a mess after all(ish). Of course, the cocktail of fear, excitement, love, and a genius idea for a novel spilled in my head did not help in the slightest. Some of us know this concoction by another name when it gets knocked over at night, and that name is the evil, dreaded, most torturous insomnia. I did not sleep until 3 IN THE MORNING! I swear, I tried everything from meditation to ajusting the climate to reading to hypnosis (which was soothing at the time, but never again because I can't look back on it without thinking CREEPY.) and NOTHING WORKED. So naturally, when I dragged my half asleep butt out of bed and stumbled down the stairs to find out how little time I really had and start running around like a maniac. (BTW, got and email from a really nice girl named Dakota, made my morning.) Luckily, someone was ready, thx Aleja. Swung around to pick up Benicio (odd, they live within a mile of each other, but Nina and I are near clear across town, and in the beginnning, those were the pairs, Benicio and Aleja, Nina and yours truly), and we were off.
The drive out to Sandi, our nanny's house is a bit of a long one (although entirely worth it in my opinion). normal people would have joined the conversation, but just listening to them go on made me realise how out-of-touch I am with normal people. For example, video games: I play Virtual VIllagers and HIdden Expedition for hours, but that's the extent of my normal people gaming. My idea of a good game is something like the app Star Walk (A penny under 5 dollars for iPad, but TOTALLY worth it!) or a digital version of the ancient Egyptian game of Senet (featured in the popular Rick Riordan book The Kane Chronicles: The Throne of Fire. We <3 you Rick, keep writing!) or even Kindle app. But it seems most normal kids play things like Zelda: Skyward Sword, Portals 2, and Mario Kart. Now it's okay if you disagree, I'm not trying to bash the games, but FOR THE LOVE OF ASTRONOMY, WHAT IN EINSTIEN'S NAME IS THAT TEACHING YOU?! I really don't get what everyone loves about these things, I prefer something that teaches observance and cleverness, or teaches important life skills like effective management, responsibility, and decision-making. H*** yeah, it's geeky, but that's me. And that's just video games! I could go on forever about the stupidity behind the soul-sucking internet demons Facebook and Twitter , celebrity (and normal people) gossip, and the like. The only normal-person's website I actually condone is YouTube, because unlike most people who just download music, I listen/karioke for hours there.
But what I hate the most about the popular world is pop litterature. See, unlike most kids with talent, I see pop lit. writers mostly as competition. Has anyone read/watched Eragon? You know why I respect that writer so much, it's because he was 17 when he wrote those books. Just think, if Eragon can do that, imagine what I can do. You know Paulo Cohelo, Rio de Janiero's star lyricst and author? Same dream, and look at him now, with The Alchemist translated into 67 different languages according to the New York Times. Some day, my name will be right up there with the greats. But I'll tell you more about writing another day.
My friends also talk so much about my old school. I guess since you're probably sitting there scratching your head, I should tell you the story.
Remember the boy from an out-of-town private school on the DI team, Elon? That school we'll call Cielo. Now, at the time we were on that team together, I went to the public school we'll call Declive. I was in 5th grade then, one of the (okay, a note to the world: being called "shy" is offensive, it really is) most anthrophobic people you'd ever seen. The difference between fifth grade me and sixth grade me was that in fifth grade at least I saw Nina more than once a month. See, in fifth grade we shared a homeroom and all our classes. We were BFFs in the highest degree, and we're still friends today. But in 6th, everything changed when we were split up. Now you may be thinking, what's the big deal, it's just a little thing. But what you don't understand is that if you're not in the same homeroom, the same classes in Declive, you drift apart. And even if that still doesn't sound so bad, you have to understand that Nina was all I had. Now, I'm not blaming her for why I left, but even then, it was awful because my mom had breast cancer (she's in the clear now, two years. The deepest gratitude to Dana Farber and anyone who ever donated ot it.). Between being friendless and lonley and worrying half the time, and I hated my teachers and everything I we learned was standardized and drained of any creativity which I so desparately needed, I considered dark and terrible things. I'm not gonna lie, suicide was up there on the list But there were three things that saved my life: Spanish, my friends from the team, who I never saw in school either who had no idea what I was considering, and the idea that my parents were willing to do: they wanted to send me to private school, in particular a little place called Cielo. You see, Cielo is my dream school, where there's a thousand opertunities for someone weird and quirky and tallented with creativity to boot like me. I'll tell you more about Cielo as time goes on and we near the beginning of the school year. But anyway, when I got accepted, I just knew it was fate, that this is just where I was meant to be. So now that I'm gone, there is still pain, but not the same. My mom is okay, my friends are still there, but I never see them anymore outside of DI.Yes, I'm still lonely, but Cielo is still there, waiting for me to become a hero, and leave my legacy to the world.
Yesterday, despite my rantng, was a good day. But sadly, I see that there is no way Benicio has feelings for me as deep as I do for him. I see the way he looks at her, and I know we will never be. But as the Bruno Mars song "Grenade" goes,

'Cause what you don't understand is


I'd catch a grenade for ya

Throw my hand on a blade for ya

I'd jump in front of a train for ya

You know I'd do anything for ya


I would go through all this pain

Take a bullet straight through my brain

Yes, I would die for you, baby

But you won't do the same

(Note: No,I don't hate him, he's still my friend and I would still do anything for Benicio. The rest of this song is not like him at all.)
I guess now there's only one thing elft to do, and that's tell him to be sure. I love you, Benicio, and I'll always be your friend.
So this is me, the anthrophobic, mega-loyal, girl, signing off.


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| So This Is Me... | Day 2: A Word On Words | Days 3-6: Undercover | Days 7 & 8: Dictionary Definition Loser | Day 9: The Visible Mantle | Days 10 and 11: Theoretically | Days 12-22: Geekitis | FOR EDON AND ANDREW | Days 23-25: echo | Days 25-31(?): One Leap Ahead, So Close... | Days 32-36: Lonliness is Living Death | Since You've Been Gone | Freedom | Stereotypes and Stereo News | One Thing |
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So This Is Me... - Days 7 & 8: Dictionary Definition Loser (Daily life)    -    Author : thatgirltoitgirl - USA


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