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modifier supprimer 39662 - de Maddie93 , 10 ans (Canada) - 2021-04-13 >> NEW
Ecrivain - "Chapter two!"

After what felt like hours, I finally found the next studio. I see a girl who looks about Judy’s age, smiling and grabbing papers. What a relief! She looks SUPER nice! I walk up to her. “Hi! Are you my ballet instructor?” I ask sweetly, just to make sure. The girl frowns and shakes her head. “Sorry,but no. You’re stuck with Mrs.Wodish. Toughest teacher in the book. She’s Molly’s mom.” The girl whispers sympathetically. “Who’s Molly?” I ask. She gestures towards a girl in my group. Oh no. My ballet instructor is bun girl’s mom!!! “Molly’s won every competition she’s been in here.” The girl explains. “With her mom’s training, she’s the best of the best.” I feel faint. Jasmine and Molly have been hanging out this whole time. I’m interrupted by the girl patting me on the back. “You’ll be alright. I gotta go deliver these papers. Good luck!” She grins, then walks out the door. Mrs.Wodish will probably be here soon, and I’m in PANIC MODE!!!! Then a light bulb flashes over my head. I have a flip phone, and Jasmine has an iphone. What better way to chat privately? I pull it out of my pocket and open our chat.

Allie: Hey Jasmine, are we still friends?
Jasmine: Shut up, we aren’t allowed phones
In class!
Allie: But the teacher isn’t her-

“Allie and Jasmine, put away those devices, IMMEDIATELY!!!” Yells a sharp voice. I turn around in fear to see the tall, fit, beautiful girl that is no doubt, Mrs. Wodish. And in the back of my head, I can feel the jolting sting of Jasmine’s deadly glare. “You will both be serving detention, and your parents will be notified. And, no freezies!” Mrs. Wodish continued. Jasmine steps up to me and whispers into my ear. “You have RUINED my reputation! We will, never, ever, be friends.”

39662 -
modifier supprimer 39668 - Réponse de Juliana103 (Canada) - 2021-04-15 >> NEW

I like how the story's progressing! One thing I would say is to keep WORDS LIKE THIS to a minimum. Also, start a new line whenever a different character is speaking. Happy writing!

modifier supprimer 39658 - de Maddie93 , 10 ans (Canada) - 2021-04-12 >> NEW
Ecrivain - "Chapter one!"

This was it! I was entering Premiere dance, with my brand new duffel bag that my mom finally agreed to buy for camp attire! I was the last one to arrive, so I asked someone at a desk where the day camps took place. The guy gestured to a door marked ‘studio A’. I took that as a sign and marched right into studio A. Inside I saw a girl who looked about sixteen with legs like twigs and short ruby hair that was pulled back into a ponytail. She wore huge fat rimmed black glasses, and a tank top with a name tag that read: INSTRUCTOR. She walked over, smiling. She held a clip board with a checklist on it. “Hello there! You must be… Allie?” She asked. When I nodded, she smiled. “My name is Judy Doward. I am your acro instructor.” She said sweetly. My face twists into a confused expression. “Acro?” I ask. “What’s acro?” Judy opens her mouth to reply but is interrupted by laughter from behind us. We turn to see a group of girls that must be my campmates. I see Jasmine, but mostly I see that she’s laughing too. Judy puts her hands on her hips playfully. “C’mon. The ol’ Alls is new! Give her a helping hand for Pete’s sake.” She teases. I smile at her. The girls shrug and begin to chat again. Judy bent down next to me and whispered into my ear: “Acro stands for Acrobatics, meaning like, rolls and flips and stuff.” And then she walks to the front of the studio. “Okay, girls! I need to pick up some freezies for later. But I will only get them if you promise to include Allie here in your chitter chatter. Deal?” Judy announces. The girls nod, and Judy leaves the studio. I walk over to Jasmine, who’s talking with a short girl with a few freckles and blonde hair pulled up in a tight bun. “Hey, Jasmine!” I exclaim. The girl she had been talking with glared at me and scooted away. I take her place. Jasmine glares at me as well and scoots away. I didn’t get it. I brushed my teeth this morning. I washed my hair. As far as I knew, all I’d done was said hi. I sit alone until Judy comes back. Judy gestures at me. “Were you including Allie?” She asks matter-of-factly. The girls shrug, and then Judy holds the box full of Mr.Freeze freezies over the trash can. The girls erupt in nods to save the freezies. I sigh. Maybe they were nervous for their first day too. “Ok!” Declares Judy. “Let’s get started!” She sits down on the floor. “Everyone separate.” Judy says. I rush to a spot near Jasmine, but It’s already taken by bun girl. I try to shrug it off and sit in the back left corner. Immediately, Judy twists in a pose that doesn’t look like something the human body should do! No matter how much I twist or turn, I just can’t do it! The other girls do it perfectly and laugh at me like I’m a big, clumsy, hippo. Maybe they’re not that far off. It goes on like this for the rest of class, but I still have hope. Because I, Allie Torian, do not give up that easily. Why would I? Jasmine was still my BFF, right? Or wrong? I should ask her during lunch. That seemed reasonable.But now, it was time to meet my instructor for next class. I hope they’ll be as nice as Judy! I hope I’ll be good at it! I hope Jasmine will talk to me! I hope, I hope, I hope…

39658 -
modifier supprimer 39667 - Réponse de Juliana103 (Canada) - 2021-04-15 >> NEW

Hiya! I like the concept here, but I suggest breaking up the text into paragraphs to make the reading easier. ;)

39658 -
modifier supprimer 39661 - Réponse de Maddie93 , 10 ans (Canada) - 2021-04-13 >> NEW

Sorry, I'm still working on it! But I'm glad you liked the first chapter!

39658 -
modifier supprimer 39659 - Réponse de Amaani0 (Grande Bretagne) - 2021-04-12 >> NEW

I hope the next chapter is coming out tomorrow?!

modifier supprimer 39644 - de Maddie93 , 10 ans (Canada) - 2021-04-11 >> NEW
Ecrivain - "Preview of my story!"

Hello! Today, April 23rd, I received what I thought was the best news ever. I was going to attend Premiere dance camp with my best friend! Me, my name is Allie, and my best friend, Jasmine, had been inseparable since when we met in kindergarten! It would start tomorrow, and I was psyched! I mean, she’s way better at dance then me, but I’d probably catch up, right?
This is the story of my dance camp disaster, and how, thankfully, I made it out alive.

39644 -
modifier supprimer 39645 - Réponse de Maddie93 , 10 ans (Canada) - 2021-04-11 >> NEW

Chapter one coming tomorrow!

modifier supprimer 39627 - de Delaney37 , 13 ans (USA) - 2021-04-07
Ecrivain - "I must go"

Today I fell and you did not see
How my heart stopped beating
And my life left me
Now you still believe I am here
Dreaming of you in sleep
Oh my darling never forget
The waltzes we would dance
The worlds we would emerge
and the memories we would make
Now you see that I am gone
Oh how your heart yearns for me
Please believe oh can't you see
I must go it is the only way
I am still here
Wherever you may go
Even though it won't show.

39627 -
modifier supprimer 39674 - Réponse de Delaney26 , 13 ans (USA) - 2021-04-15 >> NEW

Thanks Juliana but none of my poems are really meant to connect

39627 -
modifier supprimer 39669 - Réponse de Juliana103 (Canada) - 2021-04-15 >> NEW

This is good! I suggest you work on conveying a message in the poems, because right now the ideas are good but how they're connected is unclear. Have a good day :)

39627 -
modifier supprimer 39643 - Réponse de Delaney37 , 13 ans (USA) - 2021-04-10 >> NEW

Lol Thank you

39627 -
modifier supprimer 39642 - Réponse de Maddie93 , 10 ans (Canada) - 2021-04-10 >> NEW

This is kind of AWESOME!!!

39627 -
modifier supprimer 39633 - Réponse de Delaney37 , 13 ans (USA) - 2021-04-08 >> NEW


39627 -
modifier supprimer 39632 - Réponse de Amaani0 (Grande Bretagne) - 2021-04-08 >> NEW

As Wonderful as ever!

modifier supprimer 39604 - de Delaney37 , 13 ans (USA) - 2021-03-29
Ecrivain - "The friend I used to know"

My friend of many years
We danced in the dark
Inside that old tool shed
Something's gone horribly wrong
My friend oh she has gone
She's not like herself
She's someone new
What on earth shall I do
Something darkens her eyes
She can tell my surprise
She tells the truth
That she's not herself
She's somebody else
Not the friend I knew
That danced with me in the dark
Laughing about everything and nothing at all
Oh I must take you to the light
Return the friend with eyes of bright
Not the one who relishes the night
On this journey I shall go
Burn down heaven
Walk through hell
Anything for the friend I used to know

39604 -
modifier supprimer 39606 - Réponse de Delaney37 , 13 ans (USA) - 2021-03-30

Thank you! I got it from this alt song I really like called Your somebody else by Flora Cash. I tried really hard not to copy a lot of the lyrics though.

39604 -
modifier supprimer 39605 - Réponse de Amaani0 (Grande Bretagne) - 2021-03-30

OMG! Absolutely beautiful! Where did you get insiiration from?

modifier supprimer 39599 - de Maddie93 , 10 ans (Canada) - 2021-03-28
Ecrivain - "I love the rain"

Rain, rain, rain
Rain, rain, rain
Your raindrops glistening on my window
Splattering on the yawn freshly mowed
Some people may consider you a pest
But I think you’re the best
You are the life to my life
You are the spring to my spring
Nature needs you
I need you.

39599 -
modifier supprimer 39602 - Réponse de Maddie93 , 10 ans (Canada) - 2021-03-29

Thank you! I really do love the rain!

39599 -
modifier supprimer 39601 - Réponse de Amaani0 (Grande Bretagne) - 2021-03-29

This is the reverse song of 'Rain, Rain go away.' It's very good!

modifier supprimer 39576 - de Jacqueline137 , 15 ans (USA) - 2021-03-24
Ecrivain - "有什么中文小说推荐吗"

大家好! 我是 一个正在学习中文的美国人。尽管古典文学也可以,但我想对中国好的小说提出一些建议,最好是当代小说。

39576 -
modifier supprimer 39598 - Réponse de yangrunze8 , 15 ans (Chine) - 2021-03-28


modifier supprimer 39571 - de Delaney37 , 13 ans (USA) - 2021-03-24
Ecrivain - "The shores of sleep"

The dullness of light leaves me behind
The heart of my loves beating has gone
For sleep has found him safe and sound
Yet I am oceans away
On this island isolated forevermore
Nothing to hold keep my delight
Just my mind is keeping me by
How I wish it would go away
Darkness is engulfing my head
The shores of sleep at play
Yet as the night translates to day
I remain oceans away
Imagination shall never cease
The magic goes through the air
This is why my rest is nigh
Due this world we share

39571 -
modifier supprimer 39594 - Réponse de Delaney37 , 13 ans (USA) - 2021-03-27


39571 -
modifier supprimer 39593 - Réponse de Amaani0 (Grande Bretagne) - 2021-03-27


39571 -
modifier supprimer 39582 - Réponse de Delaney37 , 13 ans (USA) - 2021-03-26


39571 -
modifier supprimer 39581 - Réponse de Abbey50 , 13 ans (Canada) - 2021-03-26


39571 -
modifier supprimer 39580 - Réponse de Delaney37 , 13 ans (USA) - 2021-03-25


39571 -
modifier supprimer 39579 - Réponse de Maddie55 , 10 ans (Canada) - 2021-03-25

So cool!

39571 -
modifier supprimer 39574 - Réponse de Delaney37 , 13 ans (USA) - 2021-03-24


39571 -
modifier supprimer 39573 - Réponse de Jacqueline137 , 15 ans (USA) - 2021-03-24

Beautiful as always!

modifier supprimer 39563 - de Maddie55 , 10 ans (Canada) - 2021-03-21
Ecrivain - "If I could live on a cloud"

If I could live on a cloud
Oh the clouds I would bound
I would sail on the raindrops
Gazing down at the shops
The people casually strolling
Not knowing I’m patrolling
I’d patrol the skies
I patrol the skies

39563 -
modifier supprimer 39570 - Réponse de Maddie55 , 10 ans (Canada) - 2021-03-22


39563 -
modifier supprimer 39569 - Réponse de Amaani0 (Grande Bretagne) - 2021-03-22

Very Good!

modifier supprimer 39534 - de Maddie55 , 10 ans (Canada) - 2021-03-16
Ecrivain - "I want to be your friend"

You shine among the others
You are the colors
You are the light
In a sea of black and white
I want to be your friend
I want to be your friend
You stand near another girl
You jump around and twirl
And I wish I could be there too
I want to twirl with you

39534 -
modifier supprimer 39543 - Réponse de Maddie55 , 10 ans (Canada) - 2021-03-17

Thank you so much! Thank you thank thank you!

39534 -
modifier supprimer 39537 - Réponse de Amaani0 (Grande Bretagne) - 2021-03-16

I think this is great!

39534 -
modifier supprimer 39536 - Réponse de Delaney37 , 13 ans (USA) - 2021-03-16


modifier supprimer 39530 - de Delaney37 , 13 ans (USA) - 2021-03-15
Ecrivain - "The one I used to love"

You wore a suit on a simple date
Never did touch the food on your plate
Said I was all you needed
Danced with me in the rainy September
Love me said you'd always remember
The date of our first kiss
Now my heads underwater
My breath is in my lungs
I pray you'll allow me to live
When was the day
you gave all to me
The day that you held my hand
I pray that you'll hold me
but you'll never show
That we'll still be their
when you let me go
The fountain of your dreams
We would always splash in the streams
No matter the way they would look at ya
Oh where have the memories gone?

39530 -
modifier supprimer 39535 - Réponse de Delaney37 , 13 ans (USA) - 2021-03-16

Thanks! Your also very good!

39530 -
modifier supprimer 39533 - Réponse de Maddie55 , 10 ans (Canada) - 2021-03-16

Awesome! You are so good at poetry!

modifier supprimer 39524 - de Maddie55 , 10 ans (Canada) - 2021-03-13
Ecrivain - "Spring has sprung (soon)"

Spring is nearly here
I will jump and cheer
The flowers will soon bloom
Winter, you have met your doom
The rain will come pouring down
Washing away every Winter frown
The birds have sung
Spring has finally sprung

39524 -
modifier supprimer 39526 - Réponse de Maddie55 , 10 ans (Canada) - 2021-03-14

Thank you so much!

39524 -
modifier supprimer 39525 - Réponse de Amaani0 (Grande Bretagne) - 2021-03-13

Absolutely lovely!

modifier supprimer 39508 - de Maddie55 , 10 ans (Canada) - 2021-03-12
Ecrivain - "My poem: The dark night"

The dark night
The dark night has arrived
Swallowed with the animal calls that have thrived
There’s no way I will get to sleep
With all of the things that succeed to creep
By now it’s three minutes until midnight
The rusty bells will soon fright
Even in my comfy bed I’m scared
Visions of scary monsters that have glared
I hear the distant creaking of wood
Who could-

39508 -
modifier supprimer 39523 - Réponse de Maddie55 , 10 ans (Canada) - 2021-03-13

Thank you!

39508 -
modifier supprimer 39522 - Réponse de Amaani0 (Grande Bretagne) - 2021-03-13


39508 -
modifier supprimer 39510 - Réponse de Delaney26 , 13 ans (USA) - 2021-03-12

This is very good!

39508 -
modifier supprimer 39509 - Réponse de Maddie55 , 10 ans (Canada) - 2021-03-12

Please tell me what you think!

modifier supprimer 39502 - de Delaney37 , 13 ans (USA) - 2021-03-11
Ecrivain - "That girl"

She is forever winning the race
Of life love and happiness
While I am still at the back
Hoping I will survive
Yeah she will never be alone
Always has that boy to hold on too
Her friends can always be their
While I my darkness is taking hold
Yeah she she is the one
The one who will always win
every game
The one who won't drag us all behind
Make us feel like we'll never belong
Her makeup clothing
Always on point
Even though it never matters
They will always love her the same
Be with her forever
My friends are disappearing
My love was never their
Her heart grows by the hour
While mean is gone
Was it even their?
Her boy will hold her hand
While mine will lag behind
Her life will always forever will
Be better than mine

modifier supprimer 39488 - de Delaney26 , 13 ans (USA) - 2021-03-09
Ecrivain - "The world inside"

Why must boxes surround us
Lives outside our own
Change us in ways unimaginable
Listen not my child
It is no use to grow
If the other side is light
Listen not your heart
Wicked the blood runs red
Your veins have frozen dark
Evil is the land inside the mind
Villans is all it knows
Deception and lies
Cower in fear
Knowing they will never fit
Inside the shadow of your soul

39488 -
modifier supprimer 39495 - Réponse de Delaney26 , 13 ans (USA) - 2021-03-11

Thank you!

39488 -
modifier supprimer 39494 - Réponse de Maddie55 , 10 ans (Canada) - 2021-03-11

Oooh! I like it! Great poem!

39488 -
modifier supprimer 39493 - Réponse de Delaney37 , 13 ans (USA) - 2021-03-11


39488 -
modifier supprimer 39492 - Réponse de Amaani0 , 10 ans (Grande Bretagne) - 2021-03-11


modifier supprimer 39486 - de Jacqueline137 , 15 ans (USA) - 2021-03-09
Ecrivain - "Prologue to my Warriors fanfiction"

It was late leaf-bare and Leafstar and the remaining Lake cats walked warily through the snow.

"This shouldn't have happened," Leafstar thought.

Darktail and his Kin had won, and all survivors had either been captured or forced to flee the Lake. WindClan had fallen, and RiverClan's numbers had been greatly reduced. The traveling cats were mostly of ThunderClan, SkyClan, and RiverClan. They were traveling to a place that Jayfeather had heard about in a dream. It was a well-protected mountain valley to the northeast of the Tribe of Rushing Water's territory, where prey was abundant and danger was scarce. However, the cats had also been warned that in the valley.

"How much longer will we be traveling, Leafstar? The elders are tired and the kits are getting hungry", a dark ginger she-cat asked, her green eyes glazed over with exhaustion.

"Not much longer, Squirrelstar", Leafstar responded, "Look! I can see the valley!", she added. The mountain peaks that the cats had been navigating for almost a moon had lowered into a vast, forested valley. Two frozen rivers flowed downhill, eventually joining to empty into a lake at the tripoint with another river.

Finally, after almost two moons of travel, the Lake cats had arrived at the valley. There was one problem, though.

They had run into a patrol.

"This is MistClan territory!", a voice screeched before a weight flung itself onto Leafstar, digging its claws into her sides. Fortunately, Leafstar's deputy, Hawkwing was able to pounce on the other cat and scare it away before any serious damage could be done.

She leaped back up, claws bared, just in time to see a small, streamlined, light grey tabby tom run away into the winter mist. Heartbeats later, the Lake cats were surrounded by glaring eyes and puffed fur. Clearly outnumbered, they had no choice but to flee. A flurry of paw-steps told Leafstar that these "MistClan" cats were giving pursuit.

39486 -
modifier supprimer 39670 - Réponse de Juliana103 (Canada) - 2021-04-15 >> NEW

I love this! Even though I haven't read the Warriors series yet, I'm definitely interested after reading your piece! Keep on writing! 🤗

39486 -
modifier supprimer 39487 - Réponse de Jacqueline137 , 15 ans (USA) - 2021-03-09

*That other cats lived in the valley

Stupid autocorrect.

modifier supprimer 39450 - de Delaney37 , 13 ans (USA) - 2021-03-01
Ecrivain - "Bonnie my love"

The water flows around the earth
And sunlight kisses your skin
I pray that your heart won't leave me
As all of your beauty sinks in
Oh Bonnie my lass you were my home
The one I relished in
The one who walked with me through the rough
Reminding me of the world we called our own
No flower will ever meet my gaze
No sand that kisses the sea
Will ever match the beauty
that is right in front of me
Bonnie my lass how great thou are
My love is beyond compare
With that silent smile that relishes
in the magic that flows through the air
Nature has now claimed you as home
My heart will mourn for thee
As you leave the world you loved
I pray you will remember me
As the world seems out of place
As my heat calls for your name
Nature will remind that its not you too blame

Jacquelines request! A bit of a stretch but I hope you like it anyways.

39450 -
modifier supprimer 39458 - Réponse de Delaney37 , 13 ans (USA) - 2021-03-02


39450 -
modifier supprimer 39457 - Réponse de Jacqueline137 , 15 ans (USA) - 2021-03-02

:) Beautiful!

39450 -
modifier supprimer 39455 - Réponse de Delaney37 , 13 ans (USA) - 2021-03-02


39450 -
modifier supprimer 39454 - Réponse de Amaani0 (Grande Bretagne) - 2021-03-02

Great as always!

modifier supprimer 39446 - de Delaney37 , 13 ans (USA) - 2021-03-01
Ecrivain - "Hey guys!"

So I'm kinda running low on inspiration for poems so if ya'll want to give me a prompt for fun or something feel free

39446 -
modifier supprimer 39449 - Réponse de Amaani0 (Grande Bretagne) - 2021-03-01

Yes! Definitely try nature!

39446 -
modifier supprimer 39448 - Réponse de Delaney37 , 13 ans (USA) - 2021-03-01

Cool idea I'll start working on it!

39446 -
modifier supprimer 39447 - Réponse de Jacqueline137 , 15 ans (USA) - 2021-03-01

Perhaps nature?

modifier supprimer 39438 - de delilah117 , 10 ans (USA) - 2021-02-26
Ecrivain - "online vs. real me"

when online I'm always happy and strong
always has a joyful song
when in reality I hurt inside
everyone sees my cute and childish side
but I'm soft and weak
some times I want to cry
but I hide it with a smile
this is the real me
not he enthusiastic girl you see

39438 -
modifier supprimer 39443 - Réponse de Delaney37 , 13 ans (USA) - 2021-02-26


39438 -
modifier supprimer 39442 - Réponse de delilah117 , 10 ans (USA) - 2021-02-26

I also hide my pain in exclamation marks and emojis😕

39438 -
modifier supprimer 39439 - Réponse de Delaney37 , 13 ans (USA) - 2021-02-26

This is your best one yet!

modifier supprimer 39435 - de delilah117 , 10 ans (USA) - 2021-02-26
Ecrivain - "my aphmau universe"

so in this universe, the characters have kids here is my list.

aph+aaron: Abby, me but is a werewolf like Aaron(does not have her ears yet).
travis+katelen: kaly, we do not know much about her.
vlad+??: Vinn, Abby's bf.
nana/kawaii~chan+zane: lily, Abby's BFF.
garoth+lurence: luke, has a crush on Abby, Abby 2nd BFF

i will show pic.s of the characters with more details so look out for that on my account!

39435 -
modifier supprimer 39444 - Réponse de Amaani0 , 10 ans (Grande Bretagne) - 2021-02-28

Sounds brilliant!

modifier supprimer 39427 - de Jose7 , 36 ans (Pérou) - 2021-02-26
Ecrivain - "What is your favorite book?"

Hello everybody! I've read all the collection of Harry Potter. Anybody would like to discuss about your favorite book?

39427 -
modifier supprimer 39440 - Réponse de delilah117 , 10 ans (USA) - 2021-02-26

i ment 1st

39427 -
modifier supprimer 39434 - Réponse de delilah117 , 10 ans (USA) - 2021-02-26

the whole collection I didn't even finished the 3rd one

39427 -
modifier supprimer 39432 - Réponse de Delaney37 , 13 ans (USA) - 2021-02-26

Hi Jose! I love Harry Potter but my favorite book will always be Ella Enchanted.

modifier supprimer 39424 - de Delaney37 , 13 ans (USA) - 2021-02-25
Ecrivain - "I'll never belong"

Why is it that I will never belong
Always be out of verse yet still in the song
Metallica and Bach never did get along
My soul is now begging me to leave
To run away just be free
With my heart upon my sleeve
My mind tries to run away
From what it will never understand
I beg it to give a try
Maybe make a friend
I know that I ramble and never make sense
But I promise if you listen
This won't be your last chance
If I learn to dance
I hope you'll sing along
Whether in the rain or shine
I promise our minds will intertwine
I know you will be mine
Through better or for worst
But I hope you won't forget
What our life was first

39424 -
modifier supprimer 39431 - Réponse de Delaney37 , 13 ans (USA) - 2021-02-26


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Forum Métiers - Ecrivain - (c) Etudiants du Monde / Students of the World
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